freakshows found in random spots

A creepy old guy on the bus, completely drunk off his rocker, proceeded to chat me up. In what was possibly the longest 10-minute bus ride ever, he told me that he worked as a secret agent in Nicaragua, where his job was to "knock people around." Riiiight. Every time the bus made a stop and a young girl came on, he would stare as she walked by and break into song, "I'm loving this spot, where the sun is shining and the girls are hot." Great. I could not get off that bus any faster, even if I had superhuman speed or mini jet rockets strapped onto my feet. Ugh.